SIGNS YOU'RE DEALING WITH A DUMB CRIMINAL:

1) He took public transportation to and from his bank robbery.

2) He is using his seeing eye dog as a look-out.

3) Instead of a cherry pie, she shoplifted yeast, flour, eggs, and a jar of cherries.

4) You caught him driving a stolen car with "The Club" still on.

5) He tries to convince you that he thought crack was a breakfast cereal.

6) He responds to your use of verbal force with a bunch of "Yo'momma" oneliners.

7) He makes himself laugh every time he says he's innocent.

8) He claims diplomatic immunity because he's a citizen of the Republic of Texas.

9) He asks the judge for a senior citizen discount on his 7-year sentence.

10) He left footprints and a bloody glove at the crime scene.